Turning point

Reflecting about the winter solstice and went back to this post I wrote so many years ago. I think it is time to revive this tradition and make it one of our regulars. Our lives have scattered since then, the boys are grown, and Rose is about to fly. We need more traditions to keep us bound. Move into the light.

mamatrauma

I haven’t posted for a month, some of you have been checking in to see how we are doing and I really appreciate that. I struggle with posting, these have been dark days. I have been sad, angry, resentful, weak, lost, melancholy, resigned, and unmotivated. I have had to force myself to finish the work for the three classes I was taking, I think it helped to have that to focus on, it gave my brain something to do. December 13, I was done and my friends were all asking how it felt to be done with school for the semester, and I couldn’t tell them. I couldn’t really feel anything, I expected to feel relieved and lighter but I didn’t. I felt empty, and pressured by expectations that seemed meaningless. I am still mourning my Dad, Brian is still looking for work and we are living with uncertainty. Then…

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