I look at the body I was given
lying there on the alley pavement
unmoving and cold
paramedics surrounding me
pushing hard on my chest
but I don’t feel the gravel bite into my back
they shove what looks like an inflatable plastic shovel
in my throat and scoop me up
am I dead?
should I go with my body to the hospital?
for a moment my heart flutters and I feel
a rush of pain in my head
my chest burning
and my feet feel so cold, can’t I have a blanket?
next thing ten faces are
shouting things at me prying open my eyes
and I hear “pupils six and fixed”
someone is pushing air into my lungs with a large purple balloon
and I realize I am seeing my body again from the outside
shredded cloths all around me and my body exposed
it looks like me but it doesn’t feel like me at all
in fact I don’t feel any pain
that must mean I’m dead then I feel the jolt of
electricity sear through me and my heart jumps to life.